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by Abigail Van Buren

Friend Gives Tardy Co Ed Failing Grade for Punctuality

DEAR ABBY: "Hayley" is one of the few good friends I have at college. We take a class together. It's in a building across campus, so I drive. I always contact Hayley to see if she wants me to take her. (She typically does.) Because the class requires physical activity, we dress in appropriate clothing.

When I pick Hayley up, I am already dressed and ready to go. The problem is, she isn't. She is either eating or on her computer when I arrive. Once I come in, she begins to get ready. This has made us late for class several times. It has reached the point that I have to arrive earlier and earlier to get her to be on time.

I understand that I am more organized than she is, but it grates on my nerves. I am the one giving her a ride, and she causes us both to be late. I think she should be ready to leave when I get there. I know she has a busy schedule, but this is driving me crazy. I care about Hayley dearly, and I don't want to hurt her feelings. Should I say something to her? -- CAMPUS CLOCK-WATCHER

DEAR CLOCK-WATCHER: Yes, absolutely, because Hayley isn't a mind reader and if you haven't spoken up, she may be under the impression that you don't mind. Tell your friend you are no longer willing to be late to class, you expect her to be ready to leave at the time you get there, and if she isn't, you will leave without her. THEN FOLLOW THROUGH. I predict Hayley won't be late after that.