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by Abigail Van Buren

Wife's Suspicions Are Raised by Husband's Many Secrets

DEAR ABBY: I have been married nearly a year. My husband and I were together for five years before that. I am his fourth wife.

What's bothering me is he gets most of his mail delivered to his mother's -- things such as his cell phone bill, his paychecks, etc. Everything he owns is in storage in another country. He makes all his phone calls from work and never receives any at home.

I saw his credit report. He has taken out loans I know nothing about.

I love my husband with all my heart, but am I right to think a marriage isn't supposed to be this way? I feel he has two lives. -- IN THE DARK IN TENNESSEE

DEAR IN THE DARK: I don't know how many lives your husband is living, but the answer to your question is no, a marriage is not supposed to be the way yours is. Your husband's behavior is unusually secretive -- and when people are secretive, it is usually because they have something to hide.

There are many red flags in your letter, and because of that I'm advising you to talk to an attorney and find out how loans taken out without your knowledge could affect you.