Join the debate. Vote Now on the Dear Abby Poll of the week.

by Abigail Van Buren

Bumbling Behavior Is a Sore Point Between Mother and Son

DEAR ABBY: I recently married a man my family and friends, and I, all thought was the perfect man/husband for me -- or anyone, for that matter. We have been married less than two months, and I have undeniable proof that he is married to another woman in another state.

We received gifts from two showers -- one given by some friends and another given by my co-workers. Should I give them back? I want to do the right thing. There are about 20 gifts and a small gift certificate.

So far, people who know my situation say I should keep them, but are they just being polite? -- EMBARRASSED AND HEARTBROKEN IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR EMBARRASSED AND HEARTBROKEN: If they have not been used, the gifts should be offered to the people who gave them to you. However, if you have already done this and were told you should keep them, then that's what you should do. The gifts are yours to keep or dispose of as you wish, if you would prefer not to have hurtful reminders around.