DEAR ABBY: My father, "Jim," married a beautiful, nice, smart woman a short while ago. I love her enough to consider her a second mom, but when she refers to me, she never does it by name. If she's talking to Dad about me, she'll refer to me as "your daughter" or "your kid." If she's talking to her son or daughter about me, she'll say, "Jim's kid." I only know she's talking to me if she's looking at me because she never uses my name.
I wish she knew how much this hurts my feelings. I don't want to confront her because I'm afraid of causing problems. Why can't she call me by my given name? -- I HAVE A NAME IN BUFFALO, MO.
DEAR HAS A NAME: Your father's beautiful, nice and smart new wife strikes me as somewhat insensitive. However, she won't know that her actions are hurtful until you tell her. You don't have to be confrontational when you do -- just tell her that your feelings are hurt because you don't feel recognized as a person. If she's as nice as you say, she'll make an effort to do better.