DEAR ABBY: I am a 14-year-old girl. I don't get angry often, but when I do my parents disregard it by calling me a "hormonal teenager." They say things like, "She's such a CHARMING 14-year-old" and "There are hormones raging." I find their comments hurtful and degrading.
Please don't misunderstand. My parents are usually nice, but when something bothers me they automatically resort to the above comments. I personally believe I am pretty good at handling and expressing my emotions calmly. It just seems that my parents don't consider the credibility of my emotions and blame them on my being a teen. Is it wrong for them to say these things? What should I do when they say them? -- DISREGARDED IN OREGON
DEAR DISREGARDED: No one of any age wants to feel patronized, and that goes for people from 13 to 93. (And, interestingly, it happens to people from both ends of the spectrum.) If your parents want to exchange comments like the ones you mentioned, it would be better if they did so in private. However, if they are saying things like, "She's such a charming 14-year-old," it may be a clue to the fact that you're acting like anything BUT -- and perhaps you should find a more mature and controlled way of expressing your emotions.