DEAR ABBY: My wife and I recently visited our daughter and two beautiful grandchildren, "Mary" (age 17) and "Patrick" (age 15). Mary has a boyfriend I'll call "Brandon" who is all she has talked about since we arrived. She's quite smitten.
One night I was having trouble falling asleep and decided to go downstairs for a glass of wine. As I descended the stairs, I noticed Patrick and Brandon locked in a passionate embrace on the couch. They never noticed me, and I quietly returned upstairs. The boys' lovemaking did not help my insomnia.
I haven't mentioned what I saw to anybody. I am not bothered by the gay aspect of the encounter I witnessed. However, my paternal instincts make me want to protect Mary from being hurt. I don't believe in meddling, but I'm not sure keeping silent is right, either. Any advice? -- SURPRISED GRANDPOP IN PHILLY
DEAR GRANDPOP: I assume that Patrick has not yet come out to the family about his sexual orientation. If that's the case, then I don't recommend you out him by telling his sister what you saw. I do, however, think you should discuss it with Patrick, because he should be the one to tell Mary she shouldn't pin her hopes on Brandon, as he's not the person he may pretend to be.