DEAR ABBY: My 8-year-old daughter has had the same "boyfriend" since preschool almost four years ago. They play together at recess, and "Eric" has always been invited to her birthday parties. His mother, "Geneva," and I have always gotten along well and joked about the little couple.
Recently, though, Geneva learned that her son has been hugging my daughter goodbye. I have no problem with this, as I see children hug babies and friends all the time. But she has now banned the children from playing together!
This causes problems because Eric often plays at his cousins' house, which is right next door to mine. When Geneva drops Eric off next door, the neighbors get the unpleasant job of telling my daughter she isn't welcome in their yard, where she has always played with their kids. And I get to try and explain to her why everything has changed.
Abby, Geneva will not return my phone calls, and I don't know how to make things right. Also, I fear that if a hug elicits this kind of reaction, her son may just be more intrigued with physical affection. Should I keep leaving messages on her answering machine, or drop it and write her off as a nasty woman? -- VEXED IN ILLINOIS
DEAR VEXED: I don't know what has sent Geneva off the deep end, but the fact that she has taken the leap doesn't make her "nasty" -- it makes her worried and overprotective. Something tells me more may be going on with her than you are aware of, and since you have left messages for her that haven't been returned, you should not harass her.
Explain to your daughter that Eric's mother felt her son was too young to have the serious kind of relationship she felt was developing between him and your daughter. It's the truth. And it's better than allowing her to think that because she's no longer welcome to play at the neighbor's, there is something wrong with her.