DEAR ABBY: Four years ago, during my freshman year in college, I gave birth to a beautiful little boy. His father and I made the joint decision to place him for adoption. Thankfully, his adopted family keeps me involved with his life by sending me pictures and frequent updates. I have no regrets about my decision.
I am soon to be married to the most wonderful man on Earth. Recently, during our premarital counseling, the question came up concerning how we would tell our children about the son I had. After discussing this issue further, my fiance and I agreed that we would like our children to know about their half-brother from their earliest memory. Our problem is, we don't know how to tell them in a way that will not upset them, confuse them or scare them. Any suggestions? -- JESSICA IN SOUTH CAROLINA
DEAR JESSICA: I do not agree that your children should be told "from their earliest memory" that they have a half-brother who was adopted by another family. It will be easier for them to understand when they are older, and you are talking with them about the facts of life and the consequences of unprotected sex. They need to be able to engage in a dialogue with you about it at a time when they can fully comprehend your honest answers. Please consider what I have said.