DEAR ABBY: I recently inherited a substantial amount of money from my great-grandmother. I want to start a college fund for my younger cousins.
Here's the problem: My uncle (their father) has two children with his girlfriend, who also has two children from a previous marriage. I want to give the money only to the cousins who are related to me, and announce what I'm planning on my grandparents' anniversary.
My fear is that I will cause a "bad vibe" between my uncle and me since I'm excluding his "stepchildren." How should I handle this? -- LOVING COUSIN IN ORLANDO
DEAR COUSIN: Rather than make a public announcement of your intention at the celebration, I suggest you speak privately to your uncle and tell him what you have in mind. That you want to share your great-grandmother's bequest with those children who are related to her is admirable -- but the offer should be made with delicacy and sensitivity so that it does not cause a rift in your uncle's family.