DEAR ABBY: I'm 39 and divorced. I have been seeing "Jesse" for about three years. He's kind, helpful, and I enjoy spending time with him. However, Jesse has said many times that he won't marry me or even live with me. He is 17 years older than I am, and has mentioned that I should be with someone my own age.
I think Jesse is secretly afraid I won't want to be with him as he ages. It's not true. I love him and treasure every moment I can spend with him. Due to a medical condition, our relationship is strictly platonic, but I don't miss sex that much. It's more important for me to be with someone who is kind and thoughtful.
My friends say I should dump him, and I should be with someone who is willing to make a commitment. I love Jesse, but I don't get to see him very often anymore, and I'd like more from our relationship. I don't need "happily ever after," but I would like a little commitment. -- STILL HERE IN WISCONSIN
DEAR STILL HERE: If you want commitment, you will have to find it with someone else. Jesse appears to be happy with his life -- and your relationship -- just as it is. Please listen to your friends because the more you pressure this man, the less I predict you will see of him.