DEAR ABBY: Before my grandmother and mother passed on, a "five-generation" picture was taken of Nana, Mom, me, my younger daughter and her little boy. This caused some distress for my older daughter, who feels she should have been included. She was, at the time, without children -- and the decision was made by the photographer.
I'm not sure if this was right or not. Could you please tell me who should be in a five-generation photograph? -- CLAIRE IN LAS VEGAS
DEAR CLAIRE: All members of each generation should have been in the picture. In your case, that would have been your grandmother, you, both your daughters and your grandchild. To have excluded one of your daughters because she was childless was insensitive -- and obviously hurtful. She should have been included as a member of the fourth generation.
DEAR ABBY: On May 11, 2004, cancer took from me the best thing that ever happened to me. My wife and I had been blissfully married for 24 years. I miss her more than I have words to say. However, I have moved on, and I am making a new life for myself. Abby, I am doing OK.
My problem is that some of my relatives, friends and co-workers don't seem to think so. I can't get through a day without one of them saying, "You need a girlfriend," or asking me when I'll remarry. I am not the moping type and exhibit an upbeat persona. (My wife would have wanted it that way.)
How can I politely get across to them that I am comfortable the way things are? I know they mean well, but it's really none of their business. I may find someone new, but it will happen when it happens. -- GETTING BY IN TEXAS
DEAR GETTING BY: To those who say, "You need a girlfriend," say, "When I feel that way, I'm sure I'll find one." And to people who ask when you'll marry again, smile and tell them you'll do so as soon as you meet the right woman. Then change the subject.
DEAR ABBY: I am being married for the second -- and last -- time. I consider myself lucky to have found someone that I look forward to seeing and being with each and every day.
For my first wedding, my mother made me a most beautiful wedding gown that I truly treasure. Would it be tacky to update the same dress for my upcoming wedding? I don't think of it in terms of my ex-husband. I think of it only as something very special from my mom. It has been 20 years, so I would not even consider asking her to make me another. -- AWAITING YOUR OPINION IN KANSAS
DEAR AWAITING: Congratulations on your wedding. I wish you and your intended a lifetime of happiness together. If the idea of your wearing the same wedding gown doesn't bother him, I see no reason why you shouldn't do it. It has been so long since your first wedding that no one is likely to realize it. It's your day, so do as you please.
DEAR ABBY: I have a question I cannot find the answer to. I have asked many people, including the chief of staff of the U.S. Army and Madeleine Albright. Nobody seems to know the answer.
I am 90 years old, and if I don't get an answer soon, it will be too late. My question is: Can nose hair get dandruff? -- JOHN W. JOHNSON, CAPT., U.S. ARMY (RET.)
DEAR CAPT. JOHNSON: Not unless the nose has been "sniffing" dandruff.
To receive a collection of Abby's most memorable -- and most frequently requested -- poems and essays, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $6 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Keepers Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)
4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600