DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are friendly with several couples at church. These couples get together every week for a meal after services.
Abby, they frequently make plans with one another right in front of us, without ever extending an invitation. The other night, I was sitting at a table with several of the couples and became virtually invisible as they planned, in detail, an upcoming dinner party. I felt extremely awkward and uncomfortable, but the group apparently was oblivious.
Must we put up with this? Or should we take someone aside and point out how insensitive they are? I'd appreciate any ideas. -- NOT INVITED IN CUPERTINO, CALIF.
DEAR NOT INVITED: Rather than taking anyone aside and pointing it out, I recommend you look around and see if there are any other church members with better manners with whom to socialize after church. If your absence is mentioned, tell those people THEN how hurt, offended and unwanted you were made to feel by their insensitivity. But don't expect them to change. Rude people rarely do.