DEAR ABBY: My daughter, "Cindy," is 20. She's very attractive, with a great sense of humor. Because of those attributes alone, she could have any terrific young man she wants. However, Cindy has instead made up her mind to "wait for her man" -- who will be spending the next five years in federal prison for selling drugs. They became engaged just before he went in.
Cindy went into the Navy and graduated. She is being deployed to Iraq next month. Before she leaves, she will visit her fiance in prison.
I love my daughter, but this has come between us. Our relationship isn't the same as it used to be, and I am afraid that I have lost her. I have exhausted every means to stop Cindy from continuing this relationship. Have you any suggestions I might have overlooked? -- FIGHTING FOR MY DAUGHTER IN NEBRASKA
DEAR FIGHTING: Yes. Stop fighting. It will only drive your daughter further away. She is going into a war zone, and that kind of experience makes people grow up very quickly. When your daughter returns, she will not be the same little girl who went away -- and her priorities and judgments may be very different than they are now. My advice is, Don't blow your cool and say something now you'll regret later. Right now, your daughter needs all the support she can get.