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by Abigail Van Buren

Wife Plays Game of Tit for Tat and Winds Up Losing Marriage

DEAR ABBY: I am in the California National Guard. Last year I was activated and sent to Iraq. My wife has not written to me since last November. It takes me up to three weeks to get her on the phone because she wants to run around with her friends.

All I know is that I am married, and she's acting as if I don't count, only her friends do. How can I make her understand how much she is hurting me by ignoring me while I'm over here fighting? -- HEARTBROKEN SOLDIER IN IRAQ

DEAR HEARTBROKEN SOLDIER: If the woman you married is of normal intelligence, I'm sure she already knows it. It appears you have married someone who is either extremely immature or without priorities or conscience. Spouses promise to support each other in good times and in bad -- and as a military wife, her first objective should be to reassure her husband whose life is on the line every day he's away.

OperationDearAbby.net has now received more than 17 million messages of support for members of the military stationed worldwide. If you haven't already done so, please check it out. Although the one message you would most like to read isn't on it, I'm sure it will comfort you to know how many patriotic Americans have you in their hearts, and pray for your safe return.