DEAR ABBY: I am a 33-year-old mother of two little girls and a teenage stepson. This is my second marriage. It has lasted eight unhappy years, but I've stuck it out. My husband and I went to counseling and tried all the things you do when a relationship is failing; nothing has worked.
Recently, I started calling "Paul," my high school sweetheart, and things are blooming. We are both unhappy in our marriages. We have told each other we don't want to give up what we have -- only because we're both secure and comfortable.
Paul and I haven't seen each other since we were 18. (We live on opposite coasts.) So far, all we've done is talk on the phone, but things are definitely heating up. What now, Abby? -- UNHAPPY EAST COAST WIFE
DEAR UNHAPPY WIFE: Now it's time to realize that you are no longer 18 -- and teenage romances are highly idealized. It is also time to tally up what you both have to lose, should this progress into an affair. Before you make an irrevocable mistake, and in fairness to both of your spouses, go to another counselor and try to get your marriage back on track. This may not be what you want to hear, but it's the best advice I can offer.