DEAR ABBY: This summer I will be marrying "Joan," a wonderful woman who means the world to me. She is a professional who has done very well for herself, in spite of her poor command of the English language. For example, Joan uses "them" preceding a noun, says "don't know nobody," and other nonstandard forms. I have noticed her grammar is worse when she's under pressure or tired.
In six weeks, Joan will meet my family for the first time. I fear they'll be appalled by some of the things she says. How can I help my sweetheart clean up her grammar before she meets them? To Joan's credit, she is making a sincere effort to improve her language skills and has repeatedly asked me to correct her -- but it's a daunting task.
Please don't tell me my fiancee's positive qualities outweigh the language problem. This is a big roadblock for me. Your suggestions would be appreciated. -- WELL-SPOKEN GENT IN TENNESSEE
DEAR WELL-SPOKEN GENT: The best advice I can offer is this: Make up your mind whether or not you love her enough to accept her AS SHE IS -- with room for improvement. Do not correct her in front of your parents. If Joan's only flaw is her grammar, you're really a lucky man. Nobody is perfect.