DEAR ABBY: "Adam," the boy I went to the prom with last spring, had a serious car accident just before summer vacation. He had multiple injuries and some brain damage. Miraculously, he has almost fully recovered. I visited Adam many times while he was in the hospital and in rehab. I wanted to "be there" for him and his family.
My problem is, now that he is better, he wants to pick up where we left off and continue our romantic relationship. But I don't feel the same about him. It has nothing to do with his accident; it's just that I met a great guy this summer and he is now my boyfriend.
The other day, Adam told me he can't stop thinking about me, and when he does it makes him feel good. How do I tell him that we are no longer a couple without making him dejected? He is already pessimistic and could get depressed. I would like him just to be a friend. -- CAN'T GO ON LEADING HIM ON
DEAR CAN'T GO ON: Tell Adam the truth before he hears it from someone else. Make it plain that you care about his welfare and want to remain friends -- as your behavior has demonstrated -- but that you are now romantically involved with someone else.
Do not allow anyone to make you feel guilty about it. You were there for Adam when he needed you most -- and you were only dating. Neither of you had made a lifetime commitment.