DEAR ABBY: I am an 11-year-old girl who feels like I have lived long enough and it's OK to die. A girl at my school, "Kim," pressured me to give her my telephone number and the names of the boys I like. She gets her friends to threaten, corner and question me.
Now I get crank calls at least once a month. My mother called Kim's mother, but she accused me of treating her daughter badly! Kim has lied and hurt me severely. I don't know what to do. Please help. -- WANTING TO MOVE OUT OF CALIFORNIA
DEAR WANTING: If there is teasing, threatening, stalking or bullying going on at school, your teacher should be informed. If that doesn't put a stop to it, your parents should take the problem to the principal and, if need be, to the school board. You have a right to go to school without being cornered or intimidated.
Your mother should also arrange a get-together with Kim's mother and, without making any accusations, get to the bottom of what's going on. It will be time well spent.
DEAR ABBY: I am 27 and have been happily married to "Brian" for four years. Our first child is due in November. I couldn't be more excited about this baby. The problem lies with my husband. While I am sure Brian wants a baby and will love our child with all his heart, I am not sure he's ready for parenthood.
I realize that no one can ever be truly prepared for the life changes a baby can throw your way, but I'm afraid that this is not the right time in Brian's life for it. He swears that he is ready and has no regrets about my pregnancy. He claims that this is what life is all about. But I can't shake the feeling that my husband is not as ready as he claims.
I love Brian and know he'll be a great dad. However, I fear that our child may drive a wedge between us when he realizes that the baby's needs must come before his own. How can I be the mom I want to be and still keep my husband happy? -- EXCITED BUT WORRIED IN TENNESSEE
DEAR EXCITED: Since your husband has said repeatedly that he's happy about impending fatherhood, believe him. Relax and enjoy your baby. There will probably be times when you both may feel trapped and wish you could live life more spontaneously. All parents feel that way at times -- and when they do, they find a baby sitter and spend some adult time with each other.
I urge you not to obsess about the negative. That, more than anything else, could drive a wedge between you.
DEAR ABBY: You printed a letter from a woman who signed her letter "Mother of Invention." Years ago, my son, Jim, forgot my birthday, and I also sent my daughter-in-law a sympathy card with a note saying I didn't know my "negligent" son had died.
A few days later, a large bouquet of flowers arrived. Attached to the flowers was this card:
"Sorry to hear about your loss. He was a great son. We will always remember him for his timeliness. Love, Jim and Susan"
My thanks to "Mother of Invention" and to you for printing that letter. It brought back memories. -- MOTHER OF A GREAT SON IN PENNSYLVANIA
DEAR MOTHER: I like your son's sense of humor. I'll bet that was the last time he forgot your birthday.
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