DEAR ABBY: I am 27 and have been happily married to "Brian" for four years. Our first child is due in November. I couldn't be more excited about this baby. The problem lies with my husband. While I am sure Brian wants a baby and will love our child with all his heart, I am not sure he's ready for parenthood.
I realize that no one can ever be truly prepared for the life changes a baby can throw your way, but I'm afraid that this is not the right time in Brian's life for it. He swears that he is ready and has no regrets about my pregnancy. He claims that this is what life is all about. But I can't shake the feeling that my husband is not as ready as he claims.
I love Brian and know he'll be a great dad. However, I fear that our child may drive a wedge between us when he realizes that the baby's needs must come before his own. How can I be the mom I want to be and still keep my husband happy? -- EXCITED BUT WORRIED IN TENNESSEE
DEAR EXCITED: Since your husband has said repeatedly that he's happy about impending fatherhood, believe him. Relax and enjoy your baby. There will probably be times when you both may feel trapped and wish you could live life more spontaneously. All parents feel that way at times -- and when they do, they find a baby sitter and spend some adult time with each other.
I urge you not to obsess about the negative. That, more than anything else, could drive a wedge between you.