DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Brian," volunteers for a wide variety of extracurricular activities outside our home. Consequently, he never has time to do things around the house that I need him to do -- and believe me, I don't ask for much.
Last year, Brian elected to take charge of all social functions at his workplace. During the Christmas holidays, he became so immersed in his duties, we didn't even put up a Christmas tree at home. (I was laid up with a sprained ankle and couldn't do it.)
He has also volunteered to make monthly group lunches for his co-workers, yet he never lifts a finger in the kitchen at home. I feel like a broken record begging him to pitch in around the house, but what else can I do? -- WIFE OF VOLUNTEER OF THE YEAR IN MARYLAND
DEAR WIFE: Your husband appears to be using outside activities as a substitute for something that's missing at home. It's time you stopped "nudging" him and found out exactly what that is.
You can accomplish it faster through marriage counseling than beating around the bush, so stop nagging and ask your doctor for a referral. If Brian refuses to go, please go without him. You'll learn a great deal -- and that's a promise.