DEAR READERS: I received a mountain of mail responding to "Karen in Virginia," whose twin sister resented her selecting a wedding date near her own:
DEAR ABBY: My wife and I married on Dec. 10, 1961. Nineteen years later, our first daughter was married on Dec. 10. Three years after that, my son was married on Dec. 10, and two years after that, our second daughter married on Dec. 10. We think it's great. My wife and I are honored.
The most enjoyable thing about it is when we go out for our anniversary dinner together. The server asks, "Whose anniversary is it?" And we all raise our hands! -- HAPPY CHARLIE IN CONNECTICUT
DEAR HAPPY CHARLIE: I like your style!
DEAR ABBY: Two years ago my husband and I celebrated our 50th anniversary. Our oldest granddaughter wanted to be married around that same time. We ended up combining our anniversary party and her wedding -- and it couldn't have been a more wonderful day for everyone.
Those twin sisters should embrace each other and celebrate together from now on. -- HAPPY WIFE, MOTHER AND GRANDMOTHER
DEAR HAPPY: In the best of all possible worlds, they would.
DEAR ABBY: I'm a twin, and one of the many advantages of being a twin is the ability to share important times in our lives. My sister was married July 20; I was married July 19 of the following year. Unfortunately, we don't live close enough to celebrate our birthdays and anniversaries together or we would. What Karen's sister doesn't realize is that plenty of twins would love to share an event together but have lost their sister or brother.
Shame on her. She doesn't deserve to be a twin. She should have been a "singlet." -- GINNY IN CINCINNATI
DEAR GINNY: It's sad to say, but not all twins view twinship as you do.
DEAR ABBY: My twin sister, "Sue," was planning her wedding when my husband asked me to marry him. Sue was the first person I told. She immediately said, "Do you want to get married on the same day? That would be great!" As it happened, I was unable to be married on that day, but she insisted that I announce my engagement at her rehearsal dinner so our family and friends could hear it from me.
She didn't begrudge me stealing the spotlight from her wedding; instead, she was happy for me. She helped me plan every part of my wedding (I was doing it long-distance) and was an unfailing support to me. We even wore the same dress in a different color. Sue has been my best friend from the day we were born and will always be the closest person to me on Earth. -- A NON-COMPETITIVE TWIN
DEAR N-C.T.: Bravo to both of you.
DEAR ABBY: You said Karen's twin was being childish. Well, I think Karen is the competitive twin. There are many other dates that fit the parameters she mentioned. Her twin isn't the one insisting on being married close to the same day. Even her fiance said it's not a good time.
Karen's sister can't change the date of her anniversary. By insisting on being married close to her sister's date, Karen is being childish and competitive. I think she needs counseling to find out why she's so obsessed with her twin. -- HAPPY TO BE AN ONLY CHILD
DEAR ONLY CHILD: Thank you for pointing out that there are two sides to every story.
For everything you need to know about wedding planning, order "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)
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