DEAR ABBY: I have just become engaged. We're in the midst of wedding planning and choosing a date. I would like to be married on Nov. 15, 2003, because it's before the holiday season and a great time to take a honeymoon cruise.
My problem: My twin sister married her high school sweetheart 16 years ago on Nov. 16. When I mentioned the date I was considering, she got upset and said, "You're not getting married on MY wedding weekend!" My fiance agrees with her. He thinks we would be encroaching on their wedding anniversary if we got married mid-November.
My sister's husband, on the other hand, is in favor of us being married on Nov. 15. He thinks it is a good time to tie the knot because it was lucky for them, and after all, there would be an 18-year difference in the wedding anniversaries.
I view my sister's reaction as demonstrating a twinly competitiveness I thought we had outgrown long ago. Can you advise me? -- KAREN IN VIRGINIA
DEAR KAREN: While you may have thought the "twinly competitiveness" was dead, it seems it was only napping. Although I consider your sister's attitude childish, it's up to you to decide how important her objection is to you -- and whether going ahead with the wedding date you have chosen is worth the resentment it may cause in her relationship with you. Only you can make that decision.