DEAR ABBY: I could have been the teen-ager in the letter signed "Had It in Denver." He was the live-in grandfather who complained about his 15-year-old granddaughter's bratty behavior.
My grandmother moved in with my family when I was 15. She shared my room; we even slept in the same bed. It was no secret that I wasn't happy about it. I was jealous of the time Grandma spent with my mom and dad. I never yelled at my parents, but did a few things I was sorry about later.
That grandpa in Denver should talk with his granddaughter and find out her interests and concerns. (That's what my grandma did.) If Grandpa and the girl could find anything in common, maybe he could help her, rather than making things worse by complaining.
As far as Gramps' objection to "no rules, no discipline, no punishment, no guidelines" in their home, I ask, "Oh, really?" House rules may have changed big time in the last 50 years. Maybe Gramps' rules are stricter than her parents'.
Over time, my grandmother and I became good friends. I even interviewed her for my senior term paper on dating customs prior to World War I. It was a hit. (Now THOSE were the days of strict rules and regulations!)
In 1966, my beloved grandma died at the age of 75, three months after my first child was born. I shall forever treasure the close friendship we shared. –- DOROTHY SELLERS, BRAZORIA, TEXAS
DEAR DOROTHY: Your point is well taken. The generation gap can be difficult to bridge, but it's not impossible. Since Grandpa is the adult, the first attempt at peacemaking should be his. As your experience proves, it can be a bonding experience for all concerned.