DEAR ABBY: Your advice to the resentful stepmom was right on. At the age of 8, I was the resented stepchild, and didn't know why.
When I became a stepmother and was used as the dumping ground by my husband's ex, I received some excellent advice from a close friend: "Forget the reasons why the child is there, just know he needs you. Change your attitude, because you are what you think, and your actions will show it -- good or bad."
Twenty years later, my stepson handed me his newborn and whispered, "I love you for loving me like your own. Here's your grandson, Mom." I sent up a prayer of thanks for her excellent advice, because love is thicker than blood. -- THE LUCKY ONE
DEAR LUCKY ONE: Regardless of your biological relationship to your stepson, you were the parent who counted the most. It is the job of parents -- regardless of blood ties -- to nurture and protect the children given into their keeping.