DEAR ABBY: I am 13 and have been fighting with my mom. You might think "typical teenage problem," but it's not like that. Mom has a bad temper, and I inherited it. The difference is I've learned to control it and she hasn't.
When Mom gets mad at someone, she's not shy about dishing out stern words -- and if she gets really upset, she'll take it out on me for the next couple of days. Not only does she criticize, but she yells, curses and sometimes hits me.
Mom helps out at school, and when she overhears my friends joking around about what a loudmouth I am, she gets upset. When we're home she'll say stuff like, "Your classmates were insulting me by insulting you."
Other times, however, she can be super nice. After a yelling match, she usually puts herself down by telling me what a loser she is -- and then apologizing profusely. But a week later she's at it again. Abby, what's up with my mom? -- CONFUSED IN MUNSTER, IND.
DEAR CONFUSED: She may be overwhelmed or have emotional problems that should be evaluated by a doctor. You have described a classic cycle of abuse.
If you have a trusted adult in whom you can confide -- a relative, school counselor or family friend -- who could talk to your mother and suggest she get professional help, it would carry more weight than if you approached her yourself. Please don't wait.