DEAR ABBY: I have a sister I'll call Lisa, who refuses to contact any of the family. Granted, for years she was physically abused by our father, our mother was cold and emotionally abusive, and I guess the family in general was unsupportive. But no family is perfect. Right?
Everyone in the family thinks Lisa is being selfish, bitter and unforgiving, myself included. I stood by my family. Lisa turned her back.
The last time I talked to Lisa, she said she had suffered greatly due to the family and wants a life of her own. How can she do this? She claims she doesn't feel "safe" with us.
I know our family isn't perfect by any means, and I know I haven't been the greatest sister, but she can't just leave! Right? She has a responsibility to this family. Isn't she being neglectful to simply turn her back on us?
Abby, you know how important family is. How can I get Lisa to admit she is wrong and return to the family? -- FRUSTRATED SISTER IN CANADA
DEAR FRUSTRATED: Lisa isn't being selfish, bitter or unforgiving. After a lifetime of abuse, she has somehow become healthy and refuses to tolerate being mistreated any longer.
The best advice I can offer is to accept her decision and wish her well. She has served her time and has gone on to better things. Console yourself with the fact that you and the family still have each other.