DEAR ABBY: Please settle an argument. I am blessed with a good job and financial security. However, when it comes to gift giving, my wife, "Lois," and I do not agree.
I enjoy being generous; I can afford it. However, Lois believes that our relatives will feel they must reciprocate at the same level. For the most part, this would present hardship for them.
Should I go ahead and give what I want, or take into account the financial constraints of these family members? Lois thinks we should establish standard amounts for each occasion and stick to those guidelines. She says she's not cheap; she is sensitive to the feelings of our relatives. Who is right, Abby? -- BIG SPENDER IN THE GARDEN STATE
DEAR BIG SPENDER: Your wife may have a point. The burden of gratitude can become heavy when a person is unable to reciprocate at a similar level.