DEAR ABBY: I'm hoping you can reprint a letter that was previously printed in your column. It was about a child who had two grandmothers with very different interests.
At the time, our son was dating a wonderful young lady. Her mother and I had both seen your column and remarked that if our children were ever to marry, our situation would be similar.
Much to our delight, they did marry, and now they are expecting their first child. I have thought of the letter in your column many times. I would love to read it again. -- CHARLOTTE IN RICHFIELD, MINN.
DEAR CHARLOTTE: And I would love to print it again. It carries an important message. Read on:
DEAR ABBY: You often hear from people who feel trapped into "competitive grandparenting," feeling they must match the in-laws gift for gift. The same sort of comparison can develop between parents and stepparents. The kids encourage it because of all the goodies they get.
I recently heard my mother deal with the issue in a wonderful way. My sister's 5-year-old was visiting my mother and asked, "Are you going to take me to the toy store? Grandma Johnson always does."
I was horrified because my parents are nowhere near as well off as the "Johnsons." But Mother didn't get defensive. She just said, "Different grandmas are good at different things. Grandma Johnson is your SHOPPING grandma, and I am your COOKING grandma." And they went into the kitchen and made brownies!
Isn't that beautiful? I don't have any grandkids yet, but I have already decided to be their "reading grandma." -- AUNTIE M IN SAN DIEGO