DEAR ABBY: The letter from "Anxious in Niagara Falls," in which the writer asked how to deal with a false rumor in her workplace, prompted my favorite memory about such rumors. Twenty-one years ago, I worked as secretary to a highly placed military officer. One day, "Col. Smith" came into my office and said he had something personal to tell me -- a rumor was circulating in the barracks that he and I were having an affair. The colonel went on to say that he wanted me to hear about the rumor from him so I wouldn't be upset by hearing it elsewhere.
He was (and, I assume, still is) happily married to a lovely woman. I was, and still am, happily married to the finest man I know, whom I love dearly. Of course, the rumor was completely untrue. The closest we came to an off-duty relationship was living two blocks apart in the same neighborhood on post. We socialized in separate circles except once, when the colonel held a promotion party at his home and invited my husband and me.
I asked him how Mrs. Smith had taken it. He replied that she understood completely and was fine. I told the colonel that if she were fine, so was I. We mutually agreed that all was well, and felt confident that the rumor would die in a short time, which it did.
As he turned to leave, I couldn't resist playing the devil's advocate by asking, "By the way, Colonel, did we have a good time?" My ability to joke about it set his mind at ease immediately.
Abby, your advice to "Anxious" was right on the money. The rumor will die a natural death when the gossips in the workplace see no evidence to keep it alive. Sign me ... NOTHING CHANGES, CHESTER, VA.
DEAR N.C.: I'm sure your sense of humor has carried you through on many occasions. I'm also sure the colonel was sorry when your professional relationship ended. You're the kind of employee an employer hates to lose.