Abby shares her favorite recipes in two booklets: "Abby's Favorite Recipes" and "Abby's More Favorite Recipes." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 per booklet ($4.50 each in Canada) to: Dear Abby Booklets, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in price.)
Clean Hands Prevent Infection in Hospitals, Homes and Schools
DEAR ABBY: We would like to add to the discussion about unwashed hands being a hazard for patients. We are certified infection-control practitioners in a large medical center. The Association for Professionals in Infection Control and Epidemiology is a well-established organization with more than 3,000 professionals, whose goal is to promote excellence in infection control and prevention.
Hand-washing is the No. 1 prevention against spread of infection, inside and outside the hospital setting. It is important in the home, in schools and in every workplace. It is the cornerstone of infection-control practice and education for everyone who works in health care.
Proper hand-washing is taught during orientation for new employees and daily by most practitioners whenever the need arises. Soap, running water, friction and 10 to 15 seconds covering all surfaces of the hands are necessary to loosen dirt and wash the germs down the drain. It is the responsibility of all health-care employees to practice proper techniques to protect patients -- as well as ourselves.
At our facility, hand-washing is considered serious business and proper practice is enforced. Alcohol foam or gels for hand antisepsis are recommended for those "difficult times" when an employee is unable to get to a sink.
We agree with your statement, "Proper hygiene practices are an essential part of high-quality medical care." And we want Dear Abby to continue to be part of our team, promoting good infection-control practices, hand-washing and good health. Thank you, Abby. -- JAN WROBEL, RN, AND BARBARA WIXSON, RN, SUMMIT MEDICAL CENTER, OAKLAND, CALIF.
DEAR JAN AND BARBARA: I'm sure many readers will be as surprised as I was to learn that most hospitals have a full-time infection-control team or nurse whose job it is to do surveillance, prevention and control of hospital-acquired infections.
A patient, relative or friend of a patient who witnesses a breach of proper hygiene practices should report it to the charge nurse, the administrator of the facility and the infection-control coordinator. Speaking up will not jeopardize the comfort of the patient; however, failing to speak up could endanger the health, or even the life, of the patient.
DEAR ABBY: My wife and I adopted a newborn girl three years ago. We knew the birth mother three months before delivery. She is a wonderful young woman. We keep in touch four or five times a year.
She is now 21 and is being married to a very nice young man. He knows about our daughter, but his parents do not. Because our child's skin color is darker than ours, they would surely realize that her birth mother is the bride.
We have been asked to attend the wedding but not to bring our daughter. I say no -- but my wife wants to go. Help! -- OPENLY ADOPTING IN CANADA
DEAR OPENLY ADOPTING: Resist the temptation to show off your daughter at the wedding. Do as the bride wishes and give her a loving send-off as she enters her new life.
Out of Control Parents Teach How Not to Be Good Sports
DEAR ABBY: Basketball season is over, and I am appalled at some of the things that have happened to our team. Because of one family, our team has been torn apart. The coach did nothing to deserve this attack and has always acted in the most professional way. He has never embarrassed one child or our school in any way. I hope you will print my letter because there is a good lesson in it for all of us.
Abby, please share with your readers the following 10 guidelines given in the journal The Physician and Sportsmedicine for parents, to assure that blessings -- rather than curses -- come from their children's involvement in sports.
1. Make sure your children understand that win or lose, you love them.
2. Be realistic about your child's physical ability.
3. Help your child set realistic goals.
4. Emphasize "improved" performance, not winning.
5. Don't relive your own athletic past through your child.
6. Provide a safe environment for training and competition.
7. Control your emotions at games and events.
8. Be a "cheerleader" for your child AND other children on the team.
9. Respect your child's coaches. Communicate with them in a positive way.
10. Be a positive role model.
Parents: Be sensible and responsible, and keep your priorities in order! There is a lot more at stake than a win/loss record.
Abby, I cannot sign my name to this letter. It's not because I'm ashamed; it's because of fear of more controversy. -- AN INTERESTED FAN IN THE U.S.A.
DEAR INTERESTED FAN: Every year I hear about parents who behave irrationally and emotionally at their children's sporting events. Parents who cannot control their behavior, or who lose their perspective and project their own frustrated ambitions onto their children, should not attend sporting events.
I urge all parents to review the guidelines you have submitted, and consider the messages they are giving to their children -- intentionally or unintentionally.
DEAR ABBY: Morse code is NOT dead! I am president of the Lone Star Chapter of the Morse Telegraph Club. We have chapters in many cities in the United States and Canada. On May 28, our chapter will have a table at a train show in Fort Worth, Texas, and will demonstrate Morse code sending and receiving. Other chapters also do demonstrations.
We are mostly retired railroad and Western Union telegraphers, but also have members who are ham radio operators. We welcome new members. -- EUGENE WOOD, MADILL, OKLA.
DEAR EUGENE: Oops! I'm pleased to know that the announcement of the demise of Morse code was premature, that some people still use it and there is still an interest in it.
P.S. How do you say "sorry" in Morse code?
CONFIDENTIAL TO MY READERS: Easter will soon be here, and many people regard it as an occasion to give pets to small children. A word of caution: If you plan to surprise a child with a live baby rabbit, duckling or chick, please consider that living creatures need proper care. Unless you are ABSOLUTELY certain that the little pet will receive the care it needs to survive, please give a stuffed bird or rabbit instead. Regardless of how cute baby birds and animals are, they should not be given to children on impulse.
To receive a collection of Abby's most memorable -- and most frequently requested -- poems and essays, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby's "Keepers," P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)
Education Helps Autistic Kids Break Out of Their Isolation
DEAR ABBY: April is Autism Awareness Month. I'm hoping that with the number of people your column reaches, you will help us in the autism community spread the word about the need for research and education about this childhood disorder.
Autism is a neurological disorder that severely affects a child's ability to develop communication skills and social interactions. The child lives in a world of his or her own. Its rate of occurrence has increased to about one in 400 children. Autism shows up around 18 months of age or older. It mostly affects boys, at a ratio of 4-to-1. No one knows what causes autism, and as yet there is no cure.
I have a granddaughter who has this disorder. The need for research is great because, with proper education, these children can improve and lead much better lives than they did 20 years ago. My granddaughter has improved a great deal in the 18 months she has been going to school. There, she is trained by teachers with special education skills to help these kids along.
Please help our growing community of autistic children by letting people know that if they need any additional information, they can contact the Autism Society. Thank you, Abby. -- ANDREA RUSSELL, NEW CASTLE, DEL.
DEAR ANDREA: I am pleased to help spread the message. Since I received your letter, I have learned that through hard work and intensive education, people with autism can hold jobs, make friends and lead fuller lives. Autism is the third most common developmental disability, and more common than Down syndrome.
People who would like to learn more about autism should contact the Autism Society of America, 7910 Woodmont Ave., Suite 300, Bethesda, MD 20814. The toll-free number is (800) 328-8476, extension 150; the Web address is: www.autism-society.org.
DEAR ABBY: The letter from "Grateful Survivor," who felt she was in love with a man who had rescued her from drowning, instantly reminded me of an essay, "The Chemistry of Love" by Diane Ackerman, that I use in one of my writing classes at California State University.
The essay explains the chemical underpinnings of such human experiences as falling in love, giving birth, responding to danger, and finding security in long-term relationships. Ackerman points out that the human body economically reuses some chemicals for many purposes. Such is the case with PEA (phenylethylamine), which gives an amphetamine-like "high" to new lovers and also surges during dangerous or thrill-seeking behavior.
According to Ackerman, the body's use of PEA "may help explain a fascinating phenomenon: People are more likely to fall in love when they're in danger. ... Danger makes one receptive to romance."
I'm no chemist, but it may relieve the happily married "Grateful" to know that what seemed like a puzzling and excessive response was caused by a chemical process over which she had no control. -- JOAN SPANGLER, ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
DEAR JOAN: That's fascinating. I have always wondered why couples found it "romantic" to be married while skydiving, bungee jumping or diving 20,000 leagues under the sea. Ackerman's theory provides a clue.
What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS, and getting along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)