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by Abigail Van Buren

Date Rape Victim Warns Other Women to Be Wary

DEAR ABBY: A friend of mine got married a year and a half ago. She has a 9-year-old daughter and a 12-year-old stepdaughter from the marriage. Her stepdaughter does not live in their home. I believe they have visitation one day a weekend or every other weekend.

When sending Christmas gifts or birthday party invitations to her biological daughter, should the same be done for her stepdaughter -- even if some of her friends have not met her stepdaughter yet because of her infrequent visitation? -- INSULT-WARY IN NEW HAMPSHREI

DEAR INSULT-WARY: Although the younger girl's friends have not yet met the new stepsister, it would be a kindness to include her. If she's uncomfortable about attending, she can always refuse.