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by Abigail Van Buren

Donor's Mother Finds Hope in Linking Living With Dying

DEAR ABBY: The letter from "Still Laughing in Dallas," regarding the whistle and the obscene telephone calls, reminded me of my own experience.

My husband was on active duty and was often away from home. During those periods I would receive phone calls on an irregular basis. It seemed that this person would wait until about 10 minutes after I had gone to bed, then call and not say anything. It did not matter what time I went to bed.

The only thing the police suggested was to change my phone number or keep a whistle handy. I decided that the whistle would wake my children and might push the caller into something more aggressive. Finally, one evening I had enough. I told the caller that if he would just speak to me, we could have a wonderful conversation. Did he know what it was like to be cooped up with two kids under the age of 4 for days on end without another adult to converse with? Changing diapers, cleaning up smeared food all over the table and chairs? I kept talking about the children and then I heard a "click." Never another phone call.

Abby, I BORED the person into leaving me alone. -- FRANKLY BORING IN FOLSOM, CALIF.

DEAR FRANKLY: You may consider yourself "frankly boring," but I consider you to be a frankly intelligent woman who solved a difficult problem with a dose of reality. Thank you for an interesting letter.