DEAR ABBY: I have been in a relationship with a man for four years now. Two years ago he asked me to marry him, but he still hasn't set a date or given me a ring.
Whenever I bring up the subject, he gets angry and says, "When the time is right." Well, in my book, don't you normally wait to pop the question until the time is right and then offer the ring as a symbol of love and commitment?
He is 42 years old, has never been married and still lives at home with his mother. He says he could never leave her alone. His mother -- a wonderful woman whom I love dearly -- is 75 years old, but remains very active and still works 35 hours a week. She says he has never helped her financially, although he makes a decent living.
I'm beginning to grow weary of waiting for "the right time." What do you think of this situation? -- THE WIFE-IN-WAITING
DEAR WAITING: He has told you directly that he could never leave his mother. She's in excellent health and, from your description, is vigorous -- so you could be "waiting" for this man to get off the dime for a very long time. Let me go on record: Waiting for someone to die is the longest wait in the world.
If it's marriage you want, it's time to move on and find an eligible man. This one's already taken.