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by Abigail Van Buren

Bar Hopping Fiance Leaves Engagement Behind at Home

DEAR ABBY: I have been with my fiance for two years. We've been engaged for six months. He refuses to set a wedding date, and his whole attitude toward me and our relationship has changed. Now he wants to go to bars with his friends without me. In fact, he never wants to go anywhere with me.

When our relationship first started, we decided we had found each other, and there was no need to go to bars any longer. Especially now that we're engaged!

Abby, I feel like he doesn't love me anymore, or he's ashamed of me. I don't know if it's already over and he doesn't know how to escape -- or if I should hold on. I love him more than anything and want to marry him and grow old with him. But how do I know if he feels the same? He says he does. What do I do now? -- HEARTBROKEN IN KNOXVILLE

DEAR HEARTBROKEN: It seems your fiance still has some wild oats to sow. In a healthy relationship, a person's actions and words are the same, but this young man is saying one thing and doing something else.

Call off the engagement. Since he refuses to set a date, it wasn't much of an engagement anyway. You deserve a husband who loves you more than anything and wants to marry you and grow old with you. You haven't found him yet!