DEAR ABBY: I am a 32-year-old physician who has recently been seeing a wonderful woman who is caring, funny, and has a beautiful heart. I am very much in love with her.
The problem? Her table manners. I feel bad for letting such a trivial issue bug me, but my brothers, sister and I were raised with emphasis on table manners. It was a great source of pride for my mother and grandmother, so I am having a difficult time ignoring the matter.
We live in a small town where people frequently invite each other to dinner. I confess I am concerned about what others may think.
Abby, I know this is a petty issue in the grand scheme of things, but I'm having a hard time ignoring it. Have you any suggestions on how to give her pointers on manners without embarrassing her? -- LOOKING FOR THE WORDS
DEAR LOOKING: Begin by listing all the qualities you love about her, then explain to her there is one area in which her parents shortchanged her -- her table manners. After that, tell her exactly what you have told me and offer to coach her. You'll be doing her a great favor. Also, there are books available on the subject of etiquette. I highly recommend those by Letitia Baldrige.