Join the debate. Vote Now on the Dear Abby Poll of the week.

by Abigail Van Buren

Husband Who's a Winner Turns Out to Be a Loser

DEAR ABBY: Please answer as soon as possible, as I am in deep trouble. My husband and I went on a gambling excursion. We had an agreement that if either of us won more than $100, we would divide the amount with each other.

He won $150 on a poker machine. I asked him for my half. Our friend, Olivia, who was standing nearby, said to me, "Oh, don't take half his winnings." I told her we'd had an agreement, and I insisted, but my husband wouldn't give me the money. After that, Olivia wasn't even civil to me.

Abby, if I had won $150, I would have given my husband the agreed-upon half. I feel it's a matter of principle.

You may think this is a trivial problem, but in this house, nothing is trivial, it seems. I'm sitting here in tears. Abby, if I'm wrong, please tell me. -- WINNER'S WIFE WHO'S WANTING

DEAR WIFE: A deal's a deal, and your husband should ante up the half of his winnings he agreed to give you. However, since he didn't, dry your tears and forgive his selfishness. In the future, don't count on him to take the high road when it comes to money.

P.S. I suggest you watch out for Olivia. With friends like that, who needs enemies?

DEAR ABBY: The following came from a local magazine dedicated to our furry companions. I think it is important enough to ask you to share with your readers. -- WINONA MANCUSI, CAMARILLO, CALIF.

DEAR WINONA: You bet it is.


1. Just one litter and then we'll have Fluffy spayed.

(Studies show that virtually the entire pet overpopulation stems from the "just one litter" mentality.)

2. My dog doesn't run loose, so he doesn't need to be fixed.

(Murphy's Law says otherwise.)

3. We always find homes for the kittens.

(And that means that an equal number of kittens at the pound will be killed.)

4. I want the children to witness the miracle of birth.

(Rent a video.)

5. My dog is so cute and unique, there should be more of her.

(The shelters and pounds are full of cute and unique dogs, most with only a few days to live.)

6. It's not natural.

(There hasn't been anything "natural" about dogs since we began to develop breeds thousands of years ago.)

7. I just couldn't look my dog in the eye if I had him castrated.

(Watch it, you're anthropomorphizing.)

8. A female dog or cat should have at least one litter for health reasons.

(Medically, factually and ethically indefensible.)

9. Neutering my dog will make him fat and lazy.

(Too much food and not enough exercise make a dog fat and lazy.)

10. Fixing my pet will change its personality.

(The primary influences on an animal's personality are the kindness and care with which it is raised.)

Readers, if your pet is not spayed or neutered, make an appointment with your veterinarian or a pet clinic today.

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600