DEAR ABBY: I am a professional musician who makes my living working for the church. As you might imagine, no one gets rich in this line of work, although it has its rewards.
My problem is, in recent months I've been taken advantage of more than once. Some wealthy relatives insisted that I play the organ for their son's wedding. When I offered to play as my gift, they insisted that if I didn't accept payment, they wouldn't let me play. The wedding came and went; everyone else received a thank-you note, but I haven't received payment OR a note of thanks.
In another incident, a couple in my church who have a limited income decided to get married. Since I've known them for quite some time, I offered to play at the wedding for free. To date, I have not received a thank-you note for this gift either.
At the risk of appearing immodest, I am a very good musician, and the music at both weddings was superb. I'm no amateur -- I hold both a bachelor's and master's degree in church music.
Abby, the services of a professional musician normally are in the range of $100 to $300 or more for a wedding. The issue I'm bringing up is not so much the money as the fact that the couples seem to have had so little appreciation for what they received. Apparently my years of practice, experience and expertise are not worth their time to say "thank you." The very least the couples could do when they receive a gift is to send a note of appreciation. Don't you agree? -- MIFFED MUSICIAN IN ST. PETERSBURG, FLA.
DEAR MIFFED: Yes, I do. As you said, the very LEAST the couples should do is to send an acknowledgment of your gift; a special thank-you note would be an even more fitting acknowledgment for such a generous gift.