DEAR ABBY: A member of our family recently graduated from college -- finally! This woman is in her late 40s. For the past four years, she has spent all her free time and money on studies when she should have been spending more time with her husband, children, grandchildren and ailing parents.
She stopped socializing with friends and occasionally missed family parties because she had "work" to do. She often visited with callers at her door or on the porch because she put her studies before housekeeping and, boy, was it ever obvious! Her house was an unholy mess. It's a good thing her husband is a patient man -- otherwise, he would have booted her out and found a real wife.
During her last year of school, she lost her 4.0 average when a family member became ill. She actually cried over it, even though her grades are never going to matter to anyone.
Now that she's a college graduate, she seems hurt that no one has made any fuss about it. When she offered tickets to her graduation ceremony, there was a dead silence. Her own kids didn't even want to attend. I can understand making a fuss when young people graduate because they are at the beginning of their careers, but a degree in "the classics" won't help this woman with the job she's held for 25 years. She's now nearing retirement age, so she doesn't need a new career. Abby, do you think we should have made a big deal out of what was no big deal? Sign this ... ALICE (NOT MY REAL NAME)
DEAR ALICE: Yes, you should have, and shame on you for not doing so. My congratulations to your relative, who had the courage and determination to reach an admirable goal to enhance and enrich her life with knowledge. Furthermore, her accomplishment is all the more admirable considering the difficult obstacles she had to overcome, among them a non-supportive family.