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by Abigail Van Buren

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have seen the world. We're getting on in years and find it increasingly difficult to walk long distances, so we decided to stop flying to other countries.

I was concerned about what to do with our accumulated frequent-flier miles when a friend mentioned the Make-A-Wish Foundation. We donated our miles to it, and the foundation granted a young boy with cancer his wish to visit Disneyland.

Abby, many people allow their miles to expire and go to waste. My wife and I have donated more than 60,000 miles to the Make-A-Wish Foundation. We feel great knowing we have helped to grant the wishes of special children. -- SID FISHER, PALM SPRINGS, CALIF.

DEAR SID: Bless you for your far-reaching generosity. The Make-A-Wish Foundation is dedicated to granting the wishes of children with life-threatening illnesses. The airline frequent-flier program benefiting the foundation currently encompasses five major airlines and helps to provide tickets for children whose wishes involve travel.

Readers, if you would like to donate your frequent-flier miles to this worthy cause, call the airline that issued the miles, or visit the Make-A-Wish Foundation Web site at

DEAR ABBY: I have a problem that's eating at me. I have been with my boyfriend for two and a half years. I am 31 and he is 30. During the last year and a half, we have lived in a house we own together.

My problem: I want to get married, and he says he's scared, confused and doesn't want to end up divorced. I am divorced and have three children. He has never been married and has no children.

He treats me wonderfully and I really don't want to lose him. But marriage is important to me. I love him and he says he loves me -- but I'd like it to be HIS desire to marry me.

Should I give him an ultimatum? -- WANTS TO BE WED

DEAR WANTS: I don't blame you for wanting to be legitimately married. However, you would be making a big mistake to give him an ultimatum. A good rule to follow: Never give anyone an ultimatum unless you are prepared to lose.

DEAR ABBY: You recently printed a poem about there being so much bad in the best of us and good in the worst of us that people shouldn't gossip. You listed the author as "unknown."

I was born in 1919, and hanging in my mother's house since I was a child was a Victorian sketch showing a prone woman and a devil. Written on the sketch was the following:

"There is so much Devil in the best of us

"And so much Angel in the worst of us

"That it doesn't become any of us

"To say much about the rest of us."

In the corner of the picture is "Copyright 1904 by W.S. Childs." I thought you would be interested. -- M.N. REED, THEODORE, ALA.

DEAR M.N.: Thank you for providing the name of the author. Ella Wheeler Wilcox wrote another version:

"There are just two kinds of people on earth today,

"Just two kinds of people, no more, I say;

"Not the good and the bad, for 'tis well understood

"That the good are half bad and the bad are half good.

"No! The two kinds of people on earth I mean

"Are the people who lift and the people who lean."

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