DEAR ABBY: I have been engaged almost 14 months. My fiance never mentions marriage. When I bring it up, he says the relationship isn't great enough to discuss marriage. The only time he wants me is when I tell him I'm going to move on with my life.
He told me that I care far too much for him, and if I want him to love me the way I want him to, I will have to start caring less for him. He is much older than I am.
Abby, I just don't feel the love is being returned. Before we got engaged, he cheated on me and lied about it. He claims she was "only a friend," but it happened more than once. He still keeps in contact with her. I now have a hard time trusting him when he goes anywhere.
He says I have to forget about the past and move on to the future. I don't believe people can move on with the future while the past still haunts them. What do you think? -- WANTS TO BE LOVED IN PENNSYLVANIA
DEAR WANTS TO BE LOVED: From what you have described to me, I'm hesitant to call your arrangement an engagement. If your "fiance" is serious about marrying you, he certainly doesn't act like it. Listen to your intuition. It's pointing you in the right direction.