DEAR ABBY: I am pregnant and due in November. I want to name my son John Charles Kwiatkowski III. My father-in-law's name is John Kwiatkowski and my husband's name is John Kwiatkowski Jr. Neither of them has a middle name. My sister-in-law says that altering the name, by adding or changing the middle name, negates the title. Don't the royals in England do this all the time? Who is correct? -- KELLY-JEAN KWIATKOWSKI, WARMINSTER, PA.
DEAR KELLY-JEAN: I can't speak for the British royals, but your sister-in-law is correct. By giving your son a middle name, you make it different from the name of his father and grandfather; therefore, he will not be third in rank.
Perhaps you might enjoy this little poem to include in your son's baby book:
YOUR NAME (Author Unknown)
You got it from your father
It was all he had to give
So it's yours to use and cherish
For as long as you may live.
If you lose the watch he gave you
It can always be replaced.
But a black mark on your name, son,
Can never be erased.
It was clean the day you took it
And a worthy name to bear
When he got it from his father,
There was no dishonor there.
So make sure you guard it wisely,
After all is said and done
You'll be glad the name is spotless
When you give it to your son.
DEAR ABBY: Regarding same-sex adults holding hands while walking in public, I was reminded of the orientation we received in the Navy in 1948, prior to going ashore in Istanbul, Turkey.
We were told that it was common for Turkish soldiers to walk in public holding hands, and that unless we wanted to instigate a fight, to simply ignore it. On the other hand, we were warned that men in uniform would be targets of ridicule if they ate an ice-cream cone in public!
Values, values and values -- all depends on where you are. -- RICHARD J. KLEIN, PHOENIX
DEAR RICHARD: You're right. In our ever-shrinking world, it's to everybody's benefit not only to learn about other cultures, but to keep an open mind as well.
DEAR ABBY: I recently received a wedding invitation from a relative in Oregon. I was surprised to see enclosed with the invitation a bank deposit slip and a request to help pay for the mortgage on their "dream house." Is this a common practice with wedding invitations? This request made no mention of money in lieu of traditional gifts. Am I expected to give a monetary gift along with another gift? The wedding is soon, and I'm waiting for your response before I send money or buy a gift. -- STUMPED IN SAN DIEGO
DEAR STUMPED: Send a gift and ignore the request for money ... unless you can send a little toy bird that says "Cheap, cheap!"
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