DEAR ABBY: A friend wanted to come with her daughter and three teen-aged grandchildren to spend some time with me after Christmas. My home had just been redecorated, and I told her honestly that I was not set up to accommodate five guests. She laughed and said the teen-agers could camp out in the living room -- a room with brand-new off-white carpet.
I told her I was not comfortable with this arrangement. She became outraged, and in an extremely nasty way terminated our 20-year friendship.
Was I wrong to feel so protective of my new furniture and carpeting? And how can I put into perspective such an unpleasant rejection? -- GRIEVING IN HERMOSA BEACH, CALIF.
DEAR GRIEVING: Although you value the 20-year friendship, it obviously meant more to you than it did to your "friend." You had every right to decline the role of hostess to her, her daughter and the three teens. For her to have asked was an imposition.
Don't dwell on it. Putting it in a positive light, her "rejection" frees you to devote more time to someone who is a genuine friend.