DEAR ABBY: We enjoy taking vacations with our married son and his family; it gives us quality time with them, especially the grandchildren.
However, I don't know if I can continue because their idea of a vacation is to do absolutely nothing. I do all the cooking, cleaning, washing and baby sitting. By the end of the week, I am worn out. The same thing happens when they come to our home. I would prefer to spend my time with the grandchildren. What would you suggest I do? -- TIRED MOM IN GEORGIA
DEAR TIRED MOM: Your predicament may be of your own making, because you pitch right in and get things organized without asking for help. Confer with the other adults in your family and lay down ground rules for your vacations. Parcel out duties, even to the children. Trade off on the cooking and cleaning chores, and baby-sit when it is convenient for YOU. At the start of the vacation, post a list of chores in the kitchen, and rotate the duties every few days so no one is overburdened.
You might enjoy this poem for vacationers:
OUR PLACE AT THE LAKE
by Sylvia L.K. Bundy
June is past, so is July,
August is ended -- likewise I.
The pattering feet of summer and sun
Are over, complete, exhausted, done!
I've fed the young as well as the old,
I've cooled the warm, I've warmed the cold.
The wounded and weeping I have consoled,
The tender and touchy I have cajoled.
I have steeled the scared, I have scared the bold,
I have bit my tongue till it was controlled.
I've broiled the steak, I have casseroled,
And the grocer thinks I am made of gold.
(The other bills I have pigeon-holed.)
And frankly, friends, I am ready to fold!
Next time I live I'll make the most
Of being the guest, not the host.