DEAR ABBY: Re the judge and Ph.D. who were planning their wedding and wanted to know how they should be properly announced at the ceremony:
In my opinion, your advice was off the mark. In this day and age of women keeping their own names and having their own titles, announcing them as "Mr. and Mrs. Hisfirstname Hislastname" is inappropriate. This portion of the ceremony is about the new status of the couple AND their "new names."
While it's true that the wedding is "about the two of you becoming husband and wife, not judge and doctor," it is also true that becoming husband and wife is NOT about the wife's being called Mrs. Hisfirstname Hislastname anymore. Or even about the titles of "Mr." or "Mrs." where those are not applicable.
How about omitting this outdated "announcement" of new names and identities altogether? Is there any reason the presentation cannot be along the lines of, "Let's welcome John and Sally, husband and wife," or eliminated entirely? -- FLORIDA LAWYER
DEAR FLORIDA LAWYER: Of course not. Today, many couples opt for customizing their wedding ceremonies, and most clergy are cooperative about adding or deleting from the standard text.
That letter prompted some strong reactions from my readers. Read on for a letter with a very different viewpoint from yours:
DEAR ABBY: Dr. D., the Ph.D. from Arcadia, proves only that some educated and intelligent people are not necessarily smart. She may have a doctorate in education, but she failed Common Sense 101.
If I were the judge who is marrying her, I'd put a "stay of execution" on this wedding ceremony. In fact, I'd run as far as I could away from this "doctor" -- maybe to another state or country.
If I seem to be hard on this woman, it's because I've seen, met, spoken to, and even broken bread with this type of person. These people are selfish and self-centered. It's unfortunate that they don't recognize themselves. By the way, I'm an M.D., but you can call me "Bill." -- A BIG FAN IN SANTA CLARITA, CALIF.