DEAR ABBY: It has always disturbed me that in the white culture, women fear old age and want to look younger.
In our Native American culture, one is given a birth name; but at age 13, young men are sent out into the woods for four days to fast until they see their "vision," at which time they return and describe it to the medicine man. Then they are given their adult names.
After age 50, one is considered an "elder" of the nation or tribe, and a ceremony is held where we are given our "elder name." When individuals become elders, they are highly respected for their wisdom and are taken care of by our people as long as they live. I am proud to be an "elder" of my tribe. I don't dye my hair because pure white hair is growing in; I'm proud to be getting elderly.
We don't send our elderly off to convalescent homes or hospitals and forget about them because they're old and senile and too much trouble to deal with. We take care of them and listen to their traditional stories, which we pass on to our children and grandchildren. We have a strong spirit for our people, especially our old people.
Too bad white people don't look at life as stages, and death as a transformation to a beautiful spiritual life -- forever.
I am married to a great hereditary chief related to Chief Greylock, so I am a princess by title. May the Great Spirit walk with you and give people the wisdom of what it means to be elderly. -- PRINCESS SHEILA RUNNING WATER, PROUD ELDER OF THE WABANAKI NATION, GREAT SACRED FALLS, VT.
DEAR PRINCESS SHEILA: At the risk of generalizing, many individuals of various races regard their lives as "stages." And they'd prefer to postpone the last stage as long as possible. Entire industries have been built upon this principle.