To receive a collection of Abby's most memorable -- and most frequently requested -- poems and essays, send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby's "Keepers," P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)
Pharmacy Directions Prove Laughter Isn't Best Medicine
DEAR ABBY: I must respond to "Angela," the disgusted young woman in Savannah who has recently started to work as an intern in a pharmacy.
I am sure some of her frustration is legitimate, but in one paragraph she stated that some people are so uneducated they don't know how to take medicine. ("Have you ever known anyone to eat a suppository?")
It could happen! This is what happened to me. I was given a prescription for rectal suppositories by my doctor. I had the prescription filled at the pharmacy and was handed a paper bag stapled shut with the sheet of directions attached to the outside of the bag.
When I arrived home I opened the bag and read the directions. It said, "Insert one suppository by mouth twice daily for seven days." The same directions were printed on the label affixed to the box.
I took the direction sheet back to the pharmacy and told the pharmacist I was having a little problem following the directions. She looked at the directions, said, "Oh, my," and went immediately to the computer. Evidently that particular medication had been entered into the computer so that every time they keyed in the name, it printed out the wrong directions. Who knows how many people had received the same directions!
One of the assistants at the pharmacy said, "The FIRST direction should have been to remove the foil." We had a good laugh, but it goes to show that even educated people can get confused. -- SHELDA MILLER, EXETER, MO.
DEAR SHELDA: Although I found it hard to believe that anyone would eat a suppository or not know how to use one, evidently misunderstandings are more common than I had imagined. While these anecdotes may appear funny, ignorance in such matters is beyond laughter. Read on:
DEAR ABBY: Please tell that young pharmacy intern that she is in the wrong profession.
I know. I have been in it for 46 years and have seen just about everything. (Have you ever heard of anyone inserting a rectal suppository without removing the foil in which it is wrapped?)
That young pharmacist should keep a journal, and maybe someday she can write a book. I wish I had. Sign me ... AN OLD PILL ROLLER, SPARTANBURG, S.C.
DEAR ABBY: "Angela in Savannah" wrote to ask if you had ever heard of anyone eating a suppository.
Well, I can top that. I work in a pharmacy and was instructed that we should emphasize the fact that the foil wrapping must be removed before inserting a suppository. -- DIANNE IN DALLAS
DEAR DIANNE: Thanks for writing. If I ever get around to writing a book titled "Now I've Heard Everything," I will include this one.
DEAR ABBY: I just read the letter from Autumn R. Vogel, and I couldn't agree with her more. Men who whistle and yell at women on the street are not only rude, but put women in an uncomfortable, if not frightening, position.
I have to relate one incident where the men probably felt as ignorant as they sounded. I was walking down a busy street on my lunch hour when a car approached from behind and the men started to whistle and shout, "Hey, Baby!" As they started to pass me, they became dead silent. You see, I was seven months pregnant at the time!
I'll never forget the looks on their faces! My daughter is 16 years old now, and loves to hear how she helped me put these jerks in their places. Sign me ... HEY BABY-BABY! SCOTTSDALE, ARIZ.
ANIMAL LOVERS KILL WILDLIFE WITH KINDNESS AND SNACKS
DEAR ABBY: I can't think of a better way than by writing to you to get this all-important message out regarding people who feed wildlife. They are creating a widespread problem with serious consequences for the animals.
Out of a misguided sense of "kindness," people ignore the posted warnings and feed wild animals. I have witnessed it in every state in which I've vacationed. However, the reason I'm writing you now is the problem we're having in Arizona.
A couple of years ago, many of the deer that live in the Grand Canyon had to be humanly destroyed. Their stomachs were so messed up from eating human food that they were slowly starving to death. People should also be made aware that not only do squirrels and chipmunks bite, but they must maintain foraging and storage skills to survive the winter.
More serious still, bears are becoming a problem. Because of drought, bears are coming down from the mountains and are being fed from cabins and campgrounds. The result has been several maulings and the destruction of those bears. Two have been found shot to death by fearful humans. As a precaution, many bears are now being moved to other areas.
Abby, please implore your readers to stop feeding wild animals. They are doing wildlife no favor by giving them handouts. In fact, they are "killing them with kindness." -- GINNY POLADIAN WILLOBY, PHOENIX
DEAR GINNY: Thank you for pointing out to animal lovers everywhere the danger of putting food out for wild animals, which not only damages their survival skills, but can create serious danger to humans and domestic animals.
I called the rangers in Grand Canyon National Park to verify why the deer had been destroyed. I was informed that in addition to the crackers, potato chips and cookies visitors fed them, the deer had consumed plastic bags, food wrappers and plastic twine while foraging in trash containers for the human food to which they had become habituated. Autopsies revealed that their stomachs were clogged with ingested trash; in some cases 3 to 5 pounds of plastic obstructed the animals' digestive systems. Food could not be processed, and the animals were starving to death.
It was explained that deer expecting handouts can become aggressive and have kicked, butted, gored and bitten visitors to the Grand Canyon.
In addition to the problem with deer and bears that you mentioned, there are problems with bighorn sheep and rock squirrels, which beg. They will bite the hand that feeds them, and the squirrels carry bubonic plague.
DEAR ABBY: Thank you for your reply to "Minneapolis Reader" regarding commitment ceremony etiquette. In part, you said, "... treat their 'commitment ceremony' as though it were a wedding, because that is what it is to them and those who care about them."
Your answer was matter-of-fact, nonjudgmental and correct. -- LINDA W.
Abby shares more of her favorite, easy-to-prepare recipes. To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, More Favorite Recipes, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)
Tolerance for Nudity Depends on Which Gender Is Exposed
DEAR ABBY: "Mrs. R.B. in Santa Clarita, Calif." was bothered that the neighbor woman sunbathes in the nude, because her 11-year-old son can climb trees in her yard to peek, which no doubt he will now that he knows what goes on next door. Also, because the woman and her female friend did not object to his coming over to pick up the ball, she fears he may intentionally hit balls over the fence as an excuse to go over and get an eyeful.
You wrote: "Your neighbor has the right to sunbathe in the nude in the privacy of her fenced back yard. Better to tell your son to refrain from climbing the tree in his yard to get an eyeful."
Both you and she concerned yourselves only about the son getting an eyeful.
Imagine a gender reversal (which is so instructive in these gender-mad times!). Suppose the nude sunbathers had been men, and Mrs. B. had had a 11-year-old daughter. Would you have merely said she should restrict the 11-year-old girl from climbing trees to get an eyeful? Would she have simply expressed worry the daughter would get an eyeful, which a curious 11-year-old of either sex might do? Or would she have called the cops and tried to have the men arrested for exposing themselves to the 11-year-old girl?
Our different responses when the gender is reversed in this story reveal the differences between how we regard female sexuality and female nudity, and how we regard male sexuality and male nudity.
It reveals that we are a long way from treating males and females equally. -- JERRY A. BOGGS, WESTLAND, MICH.
DEAR MR. BOGGS: You make an interesting point. I don't know what Mrs. R.B. would have done -- but had it been my daughter, I would have first chopped down that tree, then warned the unsuspecting men next door that they'd better be on the lookout for newly drilled holes in the fence.
DEAR ABBY: "Ignored Mother" asked for words of wisdom to comfort her for not being acknowledged on Mother's Day. And she's afraid if she reminds them, then future remembrances will be done only out of a sense of duty. Are holidays a test? She needs to stop seeing herself as the hapless victim and take her happiness into her own hands. If she isn't called on Mother's Day, she should call her kids up and tell them, "It's Mother's Day, and I want to thank you for making me a mother."
If you want a birthday present from your husband, put a sign on the refrigerator weeks in advance saying, "Three weeks till the Big Day." He'll be happy and you'll be happy. And there's nothing wrong with mothers prompting their children.
I run a company and meet with new employees on the first day. I tell them that when they work here, they will need to take initiative. Everyone will be glad to help, but we are busy and might not think about stopping in to ask if they need anything.
Sometimes I forget holidays. Sometimes my kids (or my husband) forget. Who cares? I love them and they love me. Holidays are not a test. -- RESPONSIBLE FOR MY OWN HAPPINESS, MADISON, WIS.
DEAR RESPONSIBLE: You are to be applauded for your healthy attitude.
For Abby's favorite family recipes, send a long, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Cookbooklet No. 1, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)