DEAR ABBY: As a young woman, I was considered very beautiful and had so many suitors that it was difficult to choose. All of my husbands (I had several) were aggressive and successful. Although they pursued me with a vengeance, I never felt that any of them loved the "real" me. I was treated like a trophy to be shown off -- but not a person with needs. Had I been happy in any of those superficial relationships, I could have remained in any of the marriages.
Middle age has been such a blessing. I now have the loving relationship that eluded me in my youth. My present husband met me when I turned 40. Although I'm still considered attractive, I'm too old to stop traffic. But he loves me for myself.
I was always a good and loving person, but now, at last, I'm judged by my character and accomplishments -- not my face and figure. -- HAPPY AT LAST
DEAR HAPPY: You have written a thought-provoking letter. Has it occurred to you that with each of your failed marriages you grew, until in middle age YOU were sufficiently wise to choose a husband who was not seduced by appearances?