DEAR ABBY: I am 20 years old and am in college, as is my fiance. "Jack" is working his way through college. He comes from a poor but decent churchgoing family.
I am very close to my mother's sister ("Aunt Ida"), and when she heard that I had become engaged but did not get an engagement ring, she and "Uncle Ted" took it upon themselves to buy a beautiful (fake) diamond ring. Jack and I were invited to their home, where she handed Jack the ring to put on my finger.
Jack turned bright red, became very angry and didn't mince words. He told them that he didn't like to deceive people, and when he could afford to buy a ring, he would buy me one and it would be the real thing.
Now my mother is angry and isn't talking to Aunt Ida and Uncle Ted, and I'm caught in the middle. I know they meant well, but I feel terrible that my relatives put such importance on appearances. How can I defuse this situation? -- ENGAGED WITHOUT A RING
DEAR ENGAGED WITHOUT A RING: You appear to be a sensible young woman with excellent values. To defuse the situation, ask your mother to forgive Aunt Ida and Uncle Ted, because you already have.