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by Abigail Van Buren

College Woman's Education Includes Loving Married Man

DEAR ABBY: Today I'm reading about how you differentiate between the terms "having sex" and "making love." You must get tired of people picking apart what you write, but I think I have a good point in suggesting an alternative.

I agree that "having sex" is demeaning and not above what the other animals do out of instinct; but why do we have to create affection as the term "making love" suggests? Shouldn't the love already be there and the sexual interaction be the ultimate expression of that love? Perhaps the term "sharing love" better expresses what we hope that individuals of all ages are experiencing, ideally, in the marriage relationship.

Thanks for your consideration of this suggestion. I don't read your column every day, but for many years I have been enlightened or stimulated to think by your words. Thanks for your efforts, Abby. -- PASTOR RICK EDMUND, GIRDLETREE, MD.

DEAR PASTOR EDMUND: I don't know whether you (or I) can change the vernacular -- but you make a good point.