DEAR ABBY: I am 24 and my boyfriend, "Jerry," is 27. We have been dating almost a year.
Our relationship is terrific except for one problem. Jerry talks in his sleep and says the names of different women in a sexual way -- almost like he's having sex with them. Abby, I recognize a few of the names because he either works with them or we have mutual friends. I have asked Jerry about these women, and he swears he's not fantasizing about anyone or seeing anyone else. He doesn't remember dreaming about these women or calling out any names.
This is beginning to affect our relationship, Abby. I'm deeply hurt and confused, and I don't know what to do. Should I ignore it? -- ALLISON IN GALVESTON
DEAR ALLISON: It's not surprising that your boyfriend has no recollection of what he dreamed or that he talked in his sleep. Dreams are an activity of the unconscious mind, and just because someone dreams something does not mean he or she would actually do it. (I have heard from readers who dreamed of walking naked down Main Street or into a court of law -- something few would do in the cold light of day.)
Don't take your boyfriend's sleep-talking personally. If you cannot ignore it, try earplugs or separate bedrooms.